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Companion Guide for A Season in Hell

I'm killing myself and I know it;
I'm defeating the whole purpose of my existence.
Sometimes I wonder: Am I already dead?
I feel so incomplete,
Lost.

If I continue to live the way I am now
I will be lost, forever.
Why do I continually damn myself with self-destruction?
Can I not find some road to self-realization?
Do I want to find a road to self-realization?
I'm scared of what I might find.

And you.
I want so much to talk to you.
I want you to be there for me,
But would you turn away from me when I need you?
I am afraid to find out.
I don't want to drag you into this hell that I call my life.
If I were to use my head, I'd tell you to run like mad.
Instead, I'm listening to my heart
Crying out for you to help me.
But am I beyond the point of help?